I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize