I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
