To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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