its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
