It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize