What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Randomize
