I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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