Don't you send me to vm
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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