Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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