just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Randomize
