Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Fuck appropriateness.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
