you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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