You just made me feel so damn special
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
