It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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