This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
