let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
