Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
