I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
