Already got asked if we're dating
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
