How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
