is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
