Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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