Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
