Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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