Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
