he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
either way he was missing a nipple.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
