Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
