You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize