Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize