Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I just found a bag of teeth...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize
