So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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