I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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