so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
you will always have a special place in my vag
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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