when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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