A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
