I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
