She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
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