Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
