I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
