So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
