Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
