Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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