normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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