She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize