I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
