About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
