I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
