Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
