she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
