What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We have started to decorate penises.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
